Today is March 17th, St. Patrick's Day (notice the Irish green for both father and son!), and more importantly (at least from our admittedly biased perspective) the one month-iversary of Tiernan Marc!
The last month has flown by. Our days and nights have been consumed by looking after our son. It really is amazing how much time it takes! It's good though. I love spending time with him, just holding him in my arms or chatting to him as he stares back wide-eyed. It's already becoming hard to remember what life was like without him!
There are admittedly less picturesque moments. Early in the morning for example, when I'm trying to catch another hour's sleep and he starts crying for attention as if the world was coming to an end. Or tonight for example when I unwrapped him from his towel after his bath to find that he had pooped all over the towel and on my t-shirt as well. Yes, definitely not picturesque.
I had intended to get this blog up online earlier than this, but I've found it hard to get a lot done the last month. The day before Tiernan was born, I started having a flare-up of my Crohn's disease. Stress, I guess. I kept hoping it would go away as I got more sleep. This past week was March break. I was forced to admit that I wasn't getting any better, possibly because I wasn't yet getting more sleep! So, I got some meds from the doctor and started taking them. I don't like the side effects, but I am starting to feel better. Well enough in fact to finally finish the opening entries of this blog! So, I think I should just write a short summary of the last month.
Week 1
The first week of having a son went by in kind of a blur. I must admit I didn't expect to be so overwhelmed with fatigue. Tiernan was apparently also very tired, because he was very sleepy all of the time. So sleepy that it was hard to wake him up to feed him. He seemingly didn't have the energy to feed from the breast. Instead, Deb had to express breast milk with a pump and we had to feed him with bottles. As a result, we had to be constantly washing and sterilizing bottles and the breast-pump. Getting up in the middle of the night to fill the sink to wash them and then sterilize them in boiling water meant neither Deb nor I slept well. I was glad I could be home from work.
Other than eating and sleeping, babies also spend a lot of time filling diapers. I know that's not a shock to any of you, especially those who have children. It wasn't a shock to me either and I had changed diapers before Tiernan was born. What was amazing was just the sheer quantity of them a newborn can go through! I changed more diapers in that first week than I had in the rest of my life combined.
Week 2
The second week was a lot easier in some ways. Deb's Mom and brother were now here to help out, which was great. Tiernan began to wake up more completely and to master breast feeding, which meant all of the bottle work was greatly reduced. For me, this meant I was now allowed to sleep a little more at night. Unfortunately, I needed to go back to work, and found it hard to keep up with work and to actually spend time with my son. I'm sure that dilemma will continue for years.
As he fed better, he gained weight. At the end of that week he weighed 7lbs, 10oz, and was beginning to fill his clothes out a little better. The midwife was quite happy with his progress. Overall his health continued to be good, except for a problem with gas. He spent a lot of time squirming and crying in pain because of gas. He didn't seem to be able to burp very well, and so all of the gas had to pass in the other direction. Apparently this was quite uncomfortable for him (and for anyone holding him when he actually succeeded). It was very hard to watch him in pain like this.
Week 3
In the third week Deb's Dad and my Mom and Dad all arrived to visit as well. My parents stayed with Jon and Michele. Now, his Grandma and Grandpa Duncan and his Nana and Papa Bonnar were all around at very times to help with the workload. Good stuff! Those who have lived far away from parents will know what I mean - it is so nice to have grandparents around to help.
Tiernan started to be awake for longer periods of time. He was obviously paying rapt attention to the world, eager to learn. He went to church with his Mom and Dad for the first time. I played the part of the proud father, eager to show him to anyone who would look (at school I had only been able to show pictures). Deb played the part of the protective mother, bundling him up in enough layers to protect him from a Manitoban blizzard (remember we leave in balmy B.C.) and successfully making it very difficult for anyone to really see him as I showed him off!
Deb also bundled him up carefully for our first family walk which took place during the third week. It wasn't really all that far, a few blocks and then back home, but it was very nice to get out of the house on a beautiful sunny afternoon. He screamed to high heaven when we put him in the car seat (he still does most of the time), but once the seat was latched in the stroller and we had gone about a half a block he calmed down. Then, all of a sudden, he was asleep. This ability to switch from crying to sleeping so quickly amazes me.
About this time, Deb and I realized that our arms were getting tired and we needed to start finding some other places for him to spend time. We bought an "Aquarium Bouncer" seat that plays music and makes ocean noises while little plastic fish bob and twirl. Exciting stuff. At times it now even keeps him entertained for ten or twenty minutes. If we're lucky, he falls asleep to the sound of waves on the shore.
Gas continued to be a problem for the poor little guy this week. We gave him different meds like Ovol and Anti-Colic Tablets that worked to a degree, and tried all sorts of different ways to relieve the pressure. In the end, it was his first trip to the chiropractor that made the biggest difference. She aligned some joints and everything just seemed to be able to move better internally as well.
Week 4
The fourth week was my March break. After a couple of weeks at work, it was great to be able to spend full days with my son again to work on the bonding. After this week, I think he recognizes me so much more and feels even more comfortable with me.
A number of big events happened this week, biggest of which was his circumcision day. We had put this off because we weren't really sure what we wanted to do. However, once we decided to get it done, we were fortunate to get in quickly, on Wednesday, the 15th. I won't give a lot of details here and definitely won't show any pictures! Suffice it to say, the doctor who did it specializes in circumcisions (and vasectomies for dads) and he did an excellent job. It was over very quickly and Tiernan did not get that upset because of it. Nevertheless, it was hard to go through for all concerned. It took a few days for the swelling to go down, but there was no real bleeding after and he's doing well now.
A couple of days later we took a family picture with the Bonnar family. I'm sure I'll post that here soon or at least on his Flickr photo page. It was nice to be able have a photo of everyone together, now that there are three grandkids for Mom and Dad Bonnar.
One final sign of growth took place at the end of this week. Tiernan turned over from his stomach to his back! I lay him down on his stomach on a blanket on the floor to see if he liked that position. Apparently he didn't! He instantly pushed himself over to his back. I was so surprised I reached out to grab him to stop him (I'm so used to focusing on not letting him fall off the change table or the couch). Deb had to tell me not to stop him, that turning over is actually a good thing. We wanted see if he could repeat the action, so we put him on his stomach again and once again he twisted over right away. It must be all of the muscles developed from arching his back because of gas. I decided to try the experiment one more time. This time he just lay there and cried, upset at the man who kept putting him on his stomach!
I think that should provide a good summary of what's been happening in Tiernan's life for the last month. If you made it this far, thanks for reading!
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