October - My Favourite Month

September is the death of summer's freedoms and boasts of forcing children (and teachers) back to school. November is shortened days filled with dreary skies.

October stands between these dreadful months and offers hope to the about to become depressed! Sunlight illuminates trees filled with gold and amber. Crisp days hint of winter, but still recall better days. Harvest time reveals its bounty, most importantly the pumpkin. And as if that was not enough, Thanksgiving, Halloween, and my birthday are jammed into it!

For the Bonnar family, October meant first of all a trip to Aldor Acres farm. Tiernan and Zéphyrine both loved the chance to take a hay ride out to the pumpkin patch where we were able to pick up several pumpkins. Here you can see that Zéphyrine is actually more interested in eating hay than having her picture taken. Right now, she is in the "stick everything in your mouth" mode - not the best thing at a farm!

Tiernan got the chance to pet a number of the animals including goats, sheep, cows, and rabbits. He especially enjoyed the goats, because they needed chasing before you could pet them! Zéphyrine also pet a rabbit, though she really couldn't figure out what the heck was happening. It was a beautiful sunny day and we were able to spend several hours at the farm. You can check out more photos in the Fall 2009 album.




In the middle of October, Deb and the kids took a trip to Shawville, Quebec, which is quite near Ottawa. They all had the chance to visit with a large number of members of the Duncan clan, many of whom the kids don't get to see enough - Grandma & Grandpa, Great-Grandma, Uncle Graham, Uncle Dave & Aunt Danielle, and Great-Uncle John and Great-Aunt Priscilla.

Grandma & Grandpa have a large backyard filled with tall trees. Here you can see the kids (yes, they're both there) enjoying the chance to play in the leaf piles. We've got a few more photos of this trip in the album, but not that many, because Deb's not as much of a shutterbug as I am. Hopefully some of the relatives will be able to provide some additional photos.

Not long after the rest of the family got back from the trip out east, it was time for Halloween. Needless to say, Tiernan was extremely excited about this event this year. Here you can see the pumpkins that our family carved. The one Tiernan and I did is on the left. Andy and Anthony (our homestays) did the one on the right.

Tiernan dressed as a cowboy for Halloween. Zéphyrine said she wanted to dress as Amelia Earhart because Amelia is a real role model for her. You can see more pictures in the Fall 2009 album.

It's November now, a month that doesn't have much to offer. Cold, rainy days. Longer and longer nights. A long wait until Christmas. Well, at least there's still all that leftover Halloween candy. Speaking of which, I think it's time to sign off....

And it looks like the Summer is over

To your left, you can see a picture of my happy family enjoying the summer. If you're here for the photos, you can check out several new albums linked on the right hand side. If you'd like to read an update on our family, please proceed.

September is almost over and life is busy again, which feels like an oddly comforting thing. Perhaps it's our need for routine. The past year and a half have been anything but routine. It will be nice if things settle into "normal" again.

Summer went by too quickly again. We didn't really do very much, just the ever so trendy "staycation". Deb was off work on maternity leave, but I was teaching summer school and we had an exchange student stay with us for a couple of weeks. So, we really didn't have much time to take a vacation anyways. Even if we had the time, we'd have had to stay in Canada because we don't have passports. In July though I received my Canadian Citizenship card after an 9 month wait. Now, I am Canadian again, after apparently unwittingly living in limbo for several years when rules changed for Canadians born overseas. So, we can actually apply for passports and be ready to travel, except perhaps for the time and the money issues!

Staying at home gave both Deb and me plenty of time with the kids. This is both a good and a bad thing :) We love them dearly, but there are admittedly times when you can have too much of a good thing. Tiernan is back at daycare now three days a week which gives him the opportunity to get out his energy playing with friends and gives us a chance to refuel.

Here's how we've spent the last few months.

Tim - It was strange going back to work in April after three months off on sick leave. The end of the school year was somewhat of a blur. A lot of the time it felt like my brain was stuck in molasses. I wasn't especially eager to work summer school, but my mortgage seemed to think it was a good idea. I don't know if the kids actually were worse this summer or if it just seemed that way. I was happy when it came to an end. As stated above, we didn't really do much this summer, but I did enjoy my weeks at home with the kids. I did do a few things around the house, though nothing as major as adding a room like I did last summer. There was wiring that needed fixing, a leaking toilet to repair, new screens to be made for some windows, and a whole bunch of other little things. It's funny really, our international homestays (Andy and Anthony) who live with us find it so strange for a "professional" to be doing "manual labour", but in our culture we encourage people to tinker in the trades and I enjoy doing it. Knowing when to call the professional tradesman is very important though and I try not to bite off more than I can chew.

School started up again in early September and I'm finally feeling somewhat on top of things (except for the marking that has already begun to pile up!). My jobs as International Student Coordinator and Social Studies Department Head take up a lot of my time and involve a lot of paper work. It's actually nice when I have the chance to teach! This year it's going to be fun to learn how to use the SMARTBoard that is going to be installed in my room courtesy of funds from the Langley Foundation.

Tiernan - Tiernan missed going to daycare over the summer and seeing his friends there. He kept busy though in a variety of ways. He went to a whole bunch of summer camps which meant a commitment of about an hour a day. These camps included soccer, baseball, gymnastics, cooking, and drama. He found the ones for team sports quite difficult - he's easily frustrated when he can't do something right that others are doing around him. So, we'll have to wait a while longer on things like soccer and baseball. However, he had a lot of fun at the rest of the camps and learned some new skills along the way.

Tiernan also spent a lot of time going swimming with Dad. We especially liked going to the outdoor pool in Fort Langley. He progressed a lot during the summer. At the beginning he spent a lot of time swimming in a life jacket. By the end, he could swim in the deep end by himself with the life jacket or in the shallow end without a life jacket doing a sort of hop/push/swim combination. He also loved sticking his head underwater diving for rings.

Tiernan enjoys spending time riding his scooter that he got from Grandpa and Grandma Duncan. He also spent a fair bit of time of his tricycle. (There's video of him on the scooter and the tricycle in Tiernan's Video Album). Just about a week ago we bought him a new bike because he had really outgrown the tricycle. He's had a lot of fun on the Tonka truck themed bicycle (with training wheels still attached).

Tiernan's big challenge this summer has been toilet training. It would have been great if he learned earlier, but since Deb had such a lousy pregnancy and then I got extremely ill, it's understandable that he hadn't learned. It was somewhat frustrating at times, but the use of stickers (and sadly candy and prizes) has finally succeeded. There are occasional accidents, like today when we waited too long in between toilet visits. But, for the most part he is now succeeding. Currently, he's working to accumulate enough stickers for a Little Tikes Camera. He's very excited that he's going to have a camera of his own and I'm excited that he's going to stop using mine!

Zéphyrine - Our beautiful daughter has spent the last few months growing like a weed (or perhaps a less noxious, but still fast growing plant like bamboo). Looking back at her baby pictures, I'm amazed by how much bigger she looks. She's doing a lot more now too. She is constantly moving it seems. One of her favorite places to be is in the Jolly Jumper - she just loves to bounce. She also enjoys standing and can now pull herself up to a standing position on her own. She also seems to be very close to crawling, so it's going to be even crazier here soon.

Zéphyrine loves to talk, often quite loudly making her point. She and I like to play a game where we both talk/growl at each other at the same time. She loves one-on-one attention. When I am trying to use the computer while I hold her on my lap she reaches up and grabs my face and turns it so I'm looking at her. She loves to giggle as well. Zéphyrine is a Mommy's girl, but her giggles are usually reserved for playtime with her brother. However, but just this weekend I discovered that she is now very ticklish. I had tried earlier without much success, but this time I put her in a giggle fit. Her laugh is very similar to Tiernan's. Is that genetics?

Deb - My wonderful wife had a pretty crazy last year with a pregnancy that involved a lot of sickness and then a husband getting very ill just before she gave birth. She's enjoyed having a more normal last few months. She's been keeping busy recently looking after Tiernan and Zéphyrine and a lot of things around the house. She's also been enjoying being able to go to regular Mom & Tot workout classes.

That's about all for now. I'll be trying to post more regularly this fall, but no guarantees. Enjoy the photos in the albums listed on the side.

Brand New Baby - Zéphyrine Elizabeth

We are delighted to announce the birth of our second child, a beautiful daughter. Zéphyrine Elizabeth Bonnar was born at 3:49 a.m. on Thursday, March 19th, at Langley Memorial Hospital. At birth, she weighed 8 pounds, 2 ounces, and was 20 inches long. She is a healthy, beautiful baby and we are very blessed to have her.

Deb began labour at 1:15 a.m. on Thursday, the 19th. We had both stayed up late reading and were just getting ready to go to sleep - suddenly we realized it was going to be a very tiring night. The contractions were already about 3 1/2 minutes apart, so we called the midwife after 3 contractions. Carolyn, the same midwife who had delivered Tiernan, had predicted that this would be a fast delivery, so now she told us to go straight to the hospital.

We drove straight to LMH, checked in, and got to our room at around 2 a.m. The midwife arrived not long after us. For just over an hour the contractions continued at about 3 1/2 minutes apart. Then all of a sudden things got exciting. Deb had 3 strong contractions about a minute a part. She asked me to help her kneel back on the bed and then abruptly yelled out that she had to push. The midwife was still doing paperwork as I saw the baby crown on the first push!

I called Carolyn over, and we all got ready - except for Deb, who had somehow stopped her pushing and now needed to be convinced to push again. Not such an easy thing to do, convincing her of that. After about 10 - 15 minutes, Deb decided she was ready. Four strong pushes later and the baby was out.

Unfortunately it wasn't quite over for Deb. The placenta didn't come out for over an hour and there was a fair bit of bleeding because of that. Overall though, she came through the experience better than with Tiernan's birth: less exhausted, and more able to interact with baby.

Now that we knew the baby was a girl, we gave her the name we'd chosen: Zéphyrine Elizabeth. Zéphyrine is a French name and comes from the Greek Zephyr, which means west wind or gentle breeze. It's pronounced Zeff-REEN. Two syllables, rhyming with Christine. We chose it because we liked the name and it was unique. (We couldn't give her a common name after we named our first Tiernan could we?) Elizabeth means God's promise. Elisabeth in the Bible was the mother of John the Baptist - a woman who honoured God. We hope and pray that our daughter will be both her own unique self and a woman who honours God.

Zéphyrine was very healthy at birth. We've had quite a few people ask if she was a C-Section baby because her head was perfectly round after birth. She spent most of her first day on our planet either sleeping or learning how to eat. Teaching her to breast feed wasn't easy, but it wasn't nearly as difficult as it was with Tiernan. Some extra help, prior knowledge and a more alert baby really helped. Tiernan didn't learn to breast feed for almost a week. Zéphyrine figured it out for the most part in the first day while still in hospital. We stayed in hospital for two nights and came home during the day on March 21st.

Thank goodness Zéphyrine has figured out the basics of eating well and sleeping reasonably well, because I don't know how we would have coped if was as much work as Tiernan was. Most of you know that I had been in hospital because of a liver abscess (more on that in another post). I'm recovering at home now, but both Deb and I were both worn out from that ordeal. Having a new baby is tiring enough, without going into it so fatigued in the first place.

We've had so much help from family and friends and we really appreciate all of you for the prayers and the practical support. Many friends from church and from work have visited, looked after Tiernan and provided meals. My parents have put in many, many hours coming over to help. Deb's Mom came out from Quebec to live with us for a few weeks and provided invaluable contributions taking care of us and the house.

It's now April 15th and I'm finally finishing the first blog entry about Zéphyrine. The last few weeks have been exhausting, but we still feel blessed. Being parents is a weighty responsibility and sometimes it wears us out. It is also a fantastic opportunity. Tiernan has become such a wonderful part of our lives. And now, amazingly, Zéphyrine is as well. Just like that we have a daughter we love with all of our hearts.

Liver Abscess = Not so much fun!

This year from the middle of January to the middle of April, I went through the fun of having a liver abscess. Many of you will have heard a fair bit about my illness, but some might not have heard as many details, so I thought I'd provide a brief summary/timeline. Following the summary, I've written a few final thoughts, so skip to the end if the details start to overwhelm you!

Jan. 19th - Regular gastroenterologist appointment - I saw my doctor and had a blood test. All seemed well.

Jan. 20th - I started to feel feverish and thought I had caught a flu virus. I took the next few days off work because of fevers and chills. I spent these days lying on the couch trying not to vomit while surviving on cup-of-noodles and Gatorade.

Jan. 25th - I went to a clinic because I still felt so lousy. He told me to get some bloodwork.

Jan. 27th - the clinic doctor called me in and told me I should go to the ER. Deb drove me up to the ER at Langley Memorial. I guess I must have looked pretty bad, because they rushed me right in and started doing tests right away. Four hours later I had given blood several times, had an X-Ray, an ECG, an ultrasound and a CT scan. They started me on an IV and antibiotics. Then they told me I had liver abscess that was 16cm x 14 cm x 9 cm. I.E. there was a giant mass of bacteria in the middle of my liver, making it so large it was pushing up on my lungs making it hard to breathe properly. It had probably been growing for weeks or months without my body even noticing until the fevers suddenly started.

Jan. 28th - the radiologist put a drain into my liver just below my ribs on my right side. In the first couple of days, over 2 litres of fluid drained out from the abscess. Over the next few days fluid continued to exit, but at a much slower rate. I was now on 2 antibiotics, but still getting fevers.

Feb. 2nd - a 2nd CT scan showed that the abscess wasn't much diminished in size.

Feb. 4th - transfer to Vancouver General was ordered, so I could see a liver (hepatobiliary) specialist. A long wait for transfer ensued. The worst part about the wait was the accommodations. I was staying in a very small room that I shared with 3 other people. During the time I was there I had several room-mates come and go. Somehow, it seemed to me that I had a lot of bad luck with room-mates. One elderly lady spent hours complaining to visitors or on her cell phone about having to be at Langley instead of Royal Columbian. Meanwhile, she was apparently exposing us all to a superbug she had picked up at Royal Columbian - fortunately I didn't get it. Another man had some mental issues and spent hours talking loudly to himself in Spanglish. When he did fall asleep, he snored louder than almost anyone I've ever heard! Several times he suddenly became violent with the nursing staff. Fun times with the roomies!

Feb. 9th - blood transfusion of 2 litres because my hemoglobin levels were very low. I had to wait until late in the day for the transfusion because the phlebotomist forgot to come take blood. Then the next day, I had to ask for blood work again to see if the transfusion had worked, because the doctor had forgot to request it.

Feb. 12th - I was finally transferred to VGH, getting my first ride in an ambulance - a long slow, bumpy, cold ride. I arrived at the hospital and found Deb was already there waiting for me, because the ambulance had taken a very slow route through a lot of traffic. I was extremely happy to see that I now had a single room all to myself. It seemed more like a hotel room than a hospital room, especially compared to the shared accommodation at Langley. At VGH I went a couple of days not eating for long stretches as I took more tests.

Feb. 14th - a new drain was inserted during an ultrasound. The new drain was placed so that it reached a different compartment of the abscess. Slow draining continued for the next few weeks.

Feb 20th - I was discharged from the hospital. By this time I had lost about 30 pounds. I was feeling somewhat better, but was still very tired and experiencing some pain. Once I got home, I discovered that life in hospital was a lot easier - comfortable bed, meals brought to the bed, bathroom ten feet away, etc. Although Deb did her best to look after me, she was also still nauseous from pregnancy and was also still looking after Tiernan. So, she was very tired as well.

While at home I now had to take care of my drain. Each day I flushed it with saline solution three times - pushing in saline with a syringe and then drawing out the infected fluid. At the end of each day I emptied the hemovac container the drain led to.

March 2nd - My drain stopped working properly. Fluid started coming out around the drain instead of just through it. The process of flushing the drain began to become more painful. We went back to VGH where I was admitted into the ER. There were no proper spots available upstairs, but I was moved into a shared room as the third occupant, spending the next two nights in a very uncomfortable stretcher bed. On the 3rd of March, they did another CT scan and decided after a long discussion that nothing major was wrong and that it was okay infected fluid was exiting through a tract around the tube, as long as it was exiting. Not very comforting.

March 4th - Discharged from hospital again. My Mom and Dad came and picked me up. I was in a lot of pain that day. Getting into the car was agonizing. I almost wanted to just get out of the car and walk back to the ER to say I needed to be admitted again because of the pain!

March 8th - Flushing the drain became very painful. Now I was basically unable to draw out any fluid at all and when I tried it hurt. For the next week, almost everything I did hurt. I called the doctor's office to ask what to do and never heard back.

March 13th - I went back downtown for another CT scan. It was very weird doing it as an outpatient. I actually had to walk everywhere and carry my own stuff instead of having a porter wheel me around on a stretcher.

March 17th - I went to an appointment with the specialist. He told me that the CT scan looked good and that I could have my drain removed. Then he proceeded to pull it out, right there in the office. It hurt like the dickens, but then suddenly all the pain I'd been experiencing for the last few weeks was gone. I had a major adrenaline rush that day just because I was pain free.

March 19th - I was fortunately feeling well enough to be there to help Deb through the birth of our new daughter, Zéphyrine. I spent the next few weeks trying to get rest while also helping Deb with Zéphyrine and Tiernan.

April 13th - tomorrow I go back to work for the first time in almost three months. I can't believe I've actually been gone that long. It's the longest I've been off work since I started teaching in 1996. Yes, I know, some of you think I should be used to long breaks because I'm a teacher. Ha, ha, ha. I don't really know how I'm going to do going back. I'm definitely feeling better, but I'm still easily tired and my brain feels a little foggy at times. I will do my best to "take it easy", but realistically that's more than a little hard to do in my job and with two young kids at home. Oh well, there's always that long teacher's summer to recuperate, right?


Final thoughts

1. I am very grateful to be a Canadian. Our health care system is indeed quite amazing. The care I was given was both fantastic and free. We are so glad of that, because I think if we had to pay for the care I received we would now be looking at a second mortgage.

2. We have fantastic friends (from church, work, and the neighbourhood) and family members. So many people helped us in so many ways - including providing meals, childcare, help around the house, visits to the hospital and moral support. This difficult circumstance reminded us how important our relationships are and that we are truly blessed in this regard.

3. I have a wonderful wife! I still can't really believe that Deb managed to look after the house, our two international students, Tiernan, and a sick husband while in the last months of a difficult pregnancy. Or that she continued to do so after Zéphyrine was born. Best of all - she still loves me! Seriously, she's been fantastic and I'm lucky to have her.

4. Finally, God is good. It is quite amazing how he has taken care of our family during this time. Through everything that happened we have seen God's hand at work. Often he worked through others. But he also ministered directly to us - providing the love and encouragement we needed. And he blessed us in the end, not just with my health, but with our brand new baby!